Tuesday, August 30, 2011

The All of it All - Preachy Post, Part 1

I got asked a question again today that I often get asked so I thought I'd spend a minute and talk about it.
THE ALL OF IT ALL.
How do I handle the roles of wife, mother, and photographer while having a full time job?
Do I doubt myself?
What happens when I doubt myself?
THE ALL OF IT ALL.

Today I just want to talk about the photography side of it all.
Do I doubt myself?
Yes, I totally do...sometimes.
But I tend to doubt myself or my abilities when looking at other's work through envy goggles
and not inspiration goggles.
There is always going to be someone better than me.
There is always going to be that person that just shot into the photography world like a bullet.
There is always going to be someone out there with more time to devote to the craft
or enough money to get equipment right away while I'm still plugging away with my
"Nifty Fifty".

But I'm not those people.
I'm a wife and mother and homeowner and I also have a full time job.
I am going at my own pace.
When I doubt MYSELF and if I'm on the right path, I ask myself this question:
Would I take pictures for free?
The answer is a resounding YES.
That tells me that I'm on the right path. The sweetest bonus is that I get paid for doing what I love!
Eventually, getting paid for doing what I love will allow me to leave my day job.
It will allow me to be with Griffin more.
Getting paid for doing what I love will raise the quality of my family's life.

When I doubt my ABILITIES, I remind myself this:
When I first started doing professional photography, there were people out there that loved my work.
There were people that sought me out because they liked what they saw.
I look back at those pictures and I wish I could give them all do-over sessions!
Or a hug.
:)
But they encouraged me to keep going.
So I did.

Not everyone is going to like my style.
But that's okay with me.
I will work VERY hard and put my heart and soul into those that do.
Am I awesome?
Nope.
Do I doubt that I should be doing this?
Nope.
Because it was a long, hard road for me to find THE THING that
challanges me
uplifts me
makes me feel important
makes me feel like I belong.
It's the thing I want to do first thing when I get out of bed.
It's the last thing I want to do at night.

Am I worried that my clients won't like my work?
Hells. Yes.
That fear is always there when providing a service to others.
In any capacity. 
Staying positive.
It's so insanely easy to get bogged down.
Stop comparing yourself to others.
Stop focusing on what you don't have.
Work with what you do have.
Take the hours you have in a day to devote to THE THING that you love doing
and make it count.
Some people have all day.
Some people have 2 hours.
Doesn't matter.
Make it count.
Photography, being with your children, cooking, going back to school, crafting,
blogging, underwater basket weaving...doesn't matter.
Make it count.

Lord knows I don't have all the answers.
Hubs will attest.
Late at night, when I'm tired and the house still hasn't been picked up and I'm so far behind on my editing
and I didn't get to spend as much time with Griffin as my heart needed and on and on he tells me that
it's all worth it.
Because I haven't been brought this far to be abandoned now.
Because a year from now I will have wished I started today.
Stay the course.
(I love my husband.)

Wow. I just read through this.
I can seem preachy, can't I?
I guess I just said what I want to hear when I'm down or doubtful.
There are people that believe in me.
That keeps me going.
I believe in you.

Now.
Let's go be awesome.

Happy Tuesday!

Thursday, August 25, 2011

Polar Bear

Oh the faces.
He just cracks me up!

Griffin, show me your teeth! Growl like a Polar Bear.



You are so funny!
I love you so much.
Now head upstairs. It's time for night night!



I die.

:)

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Virtual Coffee - The Rambling Health Edition

Happy Tuesday!
It's time for some Virtual Coffee.
Or, in my case, Virtual...well...nothing.
I don't have a drink with me right now but
if we were really meeting for coffee right now I'd tell you that
health has been on my mind.
About a month ago now I wrote about my health.
After writing that post, I wanted to dive right into a series of challenges for myself.
But I stopped.
And pondered.
And listened.
What I wrote about was my eating habits.
My lack of sleep.
My being overweight.
I wanted more energy.
More stamina.
To feel strong again.
But I stopped.
And pondered.
And listened.
And here's what I've learned about myself.
My life right now isn't just about eating right or getting strong by
blasting away the calories with kicks and punches and thumping music.
It's about s l o w i n g   d o w n.
I want to lose weight, yes.
I want to feel stronger, yes.
But first I want more energy.
I want to eat CLEANER.
I want my head cleared of fog and negativity.
I want a good foundation.
 So for the past several weeks I've been doing little things.
 Breathing.
Yoga.
Stretching.
Oh yeah.
That sounds a leeeetle strange.
But it's awesome.
You should try it.
Just take off your shoes and run outside and play.
 I've also been turning my phone to SILENT after 6:00pm.
This might come as a shock to some of you.
But yes.
I didn't realize that the constant dings and songs and buzzes were affecting my anxiety level as much
as they were.
 
 These little changes have made a huge difference in my anxiety level.
I feel more rested.
I'm still getting roughly the same amount of sleep as I was.
It's just better quality.
I stand taller.
My head is clearer.
I'm eating cleaner.
All these little changes have made an impact.
And that's what I needed.
That's what my body needed.
My mind.

If we were meeting for coffee right now
I'd thank you for listening to me ramble.
And I'd remind you I'm not preaching anything.
I'm just trying to find my way here.
I'd ask you how you're doing.
Have your Littles started school yet?
How is your summer list coming along?

I'm linking up with the ever awesome Amy today.
For more Cawfy Tawk head over the Lucky Number 13!

Oh Happy Day!


Saturday, August 20, 2011

Whittling The Summer List - New Crayons

We've crossed another item off our summer list.
Making new crayons out of our broken ones!
It was super easy.
I'll show you how!
 I went ahead and nabbed a new muffin tin from the store
instead of using one that I bake with.
Is that weird?
 Then we
(by "we" I mean "me" while Hurricane Griffin ripped through the house)
tore all the paper from the crayons...
 ...and placed them in the muffin tins.
I preheated the oven to 275 degrees and baked the crayons for roughly 8 minutes.
At 8 minutes there were still a few chunky bits in a few of the tins so I left them
in the oven a bit longer and took them out when fully melted.
 They looked like this when they were fully melted.
I let the tin cool at room tempurature until I could touch it with my bare hands
then placed it in the freezer.
 After about 3-5 minutes in the freezer, these little beauties popped right out!
Everywhere I read told me to spray the tins with non stick spray
but years of putting candles in the freezer to pop out old wax told me that
this should work without non stick spray and I was right.
(It's the little things.)
:)

 Friends, meet Sock Hand.
Sock hand is sneaky.
 They turned out so cute!
I'd love to hear about any fun summer lists or projects you are working on!

Happy Friday!

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

42

Yesterday was Hubs' birthday.
42.
I asked him to show me what 42 looked like.
This is what I got.
His birthday.
In pictures.
 

This day was good.
It didn't make life's stresses disappear.
It wasn't perfect.
It was small and relatively uneventful.

But it was good.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Virtual Coffee - The Pouting Edition

Sometimes we feel stuck in life.
And we wish we could just pout about it.
 Sometimes we feel like we are carried by others and are dragged along
down paths we don't want to take.
Or aren't ready to take yet.
Good or bad.
And we wish we could just cry about it.
 That's the way I've been feeling lately.
So grateful for all the wonderful opportunities that have come my way.
But there are situations that are dragging me along.
Dragging me down.
Pulling me in every direction.
I feel I have to touch absolutely everything.
Or all the good will go away.
The result?
I wind up half-assing a lot of it just to get it done.
And I'm not a half-asser.
I'm a whole-asser.

I want to cross my arms
*HARUMPH*
dig in my heels and say
NO MORE!
 But the good news is this:
This too shall pass.
This chapter in my life.
In the life of my family.
The struggles.
The anxiety.
And stress.
This shall pass.
I know this because I have faith.
I have faith that God knows the desires of my heart.
He knows what is best for my family.
Somehow,
even though I can't really see why,
I'm exactly where I need to be.
But let me be the first to tell you.
I'm ready for it to pass.
I'm ready for calm to settle in my heart.
I'm ready for the headaches and chest pains to cease.
I'm ready to feel like I've got a grip on my own life again.
I'm ready to be in a situation where I look over at Matt
and we both just smile and nod our heads because we know that that moment is so so good.
 Know this: When you are three and you are grumpy and pouty there are
two things that will make it all better.
A Mister Machine on a hot day.
 And
A monkey under a sheet, eating a cucumber.

Happy Tuesday!

I am linking up with Amy today for Virtual Coffee venting.


Sunday, August 7, 2011

Oh How Sweet It Is

This past week was crazy.
Mounds of editing.
Mounds of details for upcoming shoots.
Mounds of laundry.
 But this evening was hazy.
And lazy.
And fun.
 Bubbles were blown.
 Twirls were a must.

 Laughter was abundant.




Oh how sweet it is.

Happy Sunday!