Sunday, March 20, 2011

I'm Ready

I have no craft to post.
It was an odd, full, and crazy weekend.

I just wanted to take a second and jot down what I'm feeling right now.
In this moment.

In this moment I'm feeling
Ill-prepared.
Overwhelmed.
And excited.

I had a client meeting today and I had nothing to wear.
My day job + being a Mommy has killed my wardrobe.
Literally.
Shot. Dead.
I left the house wearing 1 of 6 shirts and 1 of 4 pair of slacks that I own outside of
t-shirts, yoga pants, and jeans.

It made me really think about how ill-prepared I am for this next chapter in my life.
I have people calling me weekly telling me they love my work.
My WHAT?!
I have a (small) body of work.
Wow.
I'm booking sessions and I'm going to begin 2nd shooting in May.
Weddings.
A. Dream. Come. True.
But I have nothing to wear.
And it's just me, my Rebel, and my nifty-fifty.
I don't have the clothes or the equipment or the know-how but it's still coming at me.

This is, quite literally, me jumping
*ready or not*
when the rope swings under my feet.

I am grateful for my clients who give me a chance to capture their life.
I am grateful for new friends, like Sarah
who are giving me a chance to learn and grow in my craft.
I am grateful that this is all happening.
Even if I don't look the part just yet or my equipment isn't quite the best,
I'm ready.
And Hubs is ready.
He's happy to see me chase my dream and supports me every step of the way.

So, yeah.
I cried today when I had to settle for not looking how I felt inside.
I cried today when I realized how close May was and how I don't have the next lens on my list yet.
But I'm ready.
I'm ready to accept that this isn't how I'm going to feel forever.
This is temporary.
This is good.
This is the moment right before the overture starts.
I'm waiting in the wings and. I'm. ready.

Dramatic much?
Yep.
:)

I have this quote with me and I read it all the time:

"You can start with nothing. And out of nothing, and out of no way, a way will be made" - Michael Beckwith

I love that.
Everyone on this earth had to start somewhere.
Literally and figuratively.
This is where I'm starting.

And I'm starting out with an attitude of gratitude. 

Happy Sunday!

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